I am (hopefully) gaining some new motivation for the inner journey via a new contemplative church gathering. It's very encouraging to spend time with others who value time spent in a "soaking" posture with God and who desire to develop a life of His presence.
We met today and encouraged each other to journal, daily, on our experiences of being and remaining conscious of God's Presence.
"Ah ha," I thought, "the perfect encouragement to get me back to my inner journey blog and reflecting regularly on God in my life."
So, here I am!
We are not, in any way, trying to "program" our daily experience of God's Presence and we recognize that it will be a very individual journey. We simply want to record how we are doing and encourage each other in the process.
For today... it was very helpful.
I started the day reflecting on a take-off of Ignatius' spiritual exercises that suggests a three part examen:
1. Gratitude-- for the graces and blessings I have experienced since my last "examen."
2. Sorrow-- an honest acknowledgment of my failings or shortcomings.
3. Planning-- asking God for His agenda for the next period of time and the help to carry it out.
This "examen" can take place on any regular basis, daily, hourly, or whatever. It gave me a focal point, today, several times in the day to come back to it and reflect on where I am at. Helpful! No stunning spiritual experiences but a greater calm and a place to return to when I might otherwise begin to spin with thoughts and emotions.
More than anything else, I have the hope that my inner life with God will again become the main thing, the central thing, and the primary desire and longing of my heart. In some ways it always is, yet so often the longings become clouded and twisted into the false longings of worldly security or accomplishment (good things, just not "the best" things). My prayer, today, is that my spirit would again be so immersed in His life and presence that I remain aware, more and more, that nothing truly fills, thrills, satisfies, and causes me to be fully alive but Him... just Him... only Him!
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