Most of us get very discouraged at our first attempts to rest more deeply in God through meditation or contemplation. We discover that our mind wanders and our thoughts don't sit still. We find little joy at first.
This is normal. Some have a spontaneous gift of meditative prayer. Most do not.
Thomas Merton, in his book on Contemplative Prayer, encourages us in this:
Meditation is sometimes quite difficult. If we bear with hardship in prayer and wait patiently for the time of grace, we may well discover that meditation and prayer are very joyful experiences. We should not, however, judge the value of our meditation by "how we feel." A hard and apparently fruitless meditation may in fact be much more valuable than one that is easy, happy enlightened and apparently a big success.There is a "movement" of meditation, expressing the basic "paschal" rhythm of the Christian life, the passage from death to life in Christ. Sometimes prayer, meditation and contemplation are "death"-- a kind of descent into our own nothingness, a recognition of helplessness, frustration, infidelity, confusion, ignorance. Note how common this theme is in the Psalms. If we need help in meditation we can turn to scriptural texts that express this profound distress of man in his nothingness and his total need of God. Then as we determine to face the hard realities of our inner life, as we recognize once again that we need to pray hard and humbly for faith, he draws us out of darkness into light--he hears us, answers our prayer, recognizes our need, and grants us the help we require--if only by giving us more faith to believe that he can and will help us in his own time. This is already a sufficient answer.
He goes on to say how valuable it is to walk through both the times of darkness as well as the times of light in prayer. Both are drawing us closer to a greater detachment from this world and an ability to rest in the reality of the Kingdom.
Ultimately we will find ourselves experience more abiding, enjoying, and living out of His presence. It's worth pressing through the initial discouragements that come!
(Feel free to post comments on this devotional blog, on your own daily devotion, on anything relating to contemplation, lectio divina, loving God.)
St Teresa of Avila also talks about patience & persistence. I think it's also good not to get attached to the 'good times' - just present yourself before God, just 'be'.
Posted by: Steve Bogner | March 29, 2004 at 04:02 AM